Cable Cafe & Bar

As many Greater Kenningtonains spend a few days working from home, we thought we would up our lunchtime review game by checking out Oval staple ‘Cable Café’ at the top of Brixton Rd. By all the brick a brac you might think you’ve stumbled into dear Aunt Flo’s house clearance after she refused to let anybody in for 40 years, but what you’re getting is a mighty fine and eclectic café. 

The daytime trade consists primarily of people popping in for hot drinks and working on their laptops, and the atmosphere is laid back and quiet. We stopped in for lunch, and the specialty is the bang on trend sourdough toasties. Your scribe had it with cheese tuna, and Phil from accounts had his with cheese and jalapeno. The sourdough was crisp and with sharp and abundant cheese (£6.50) . Phil remembered that we were at work and had an Americano as opposed to his usual massive red wine.  We also had our eyes on the homemade pastries, sharing boards, and smoothies.

What Cable does ingenuously is transform itself from a lunchtime sandwich/coffee bar to an evening cocktail and beer joint. The transition happens during the 3-5 happy hour when laptops and chargers give way to candles and, on Wednesday, live free jazz. There is a full bar on hand (cocktails £9) in addition to wines both bottled and draft (at £5, sadly quite cheap). A good alternative to the at times chaotic pubs of Greater Kennington. 

Cable Café is open from 9:00 to 23:00 (midnight weekends) and is even available to hire out for parties. We need to keep independent places like this or they may go the same way as their sister outfit Cable Bakery, which has sadly gone to that big flour mill in the sky. More importantly, we need to keep it going in 2025 to prevent it descending to the hellish netherworld that is the ‘bottomless drag brunch’. Because we’ve been there dear reader, and it’s a very dark place. 

The Return of Firecracker

We have expended an inordinate amount of emotional energy worrying about the former ‘Firecracker’ site in Windmill Row in Kennington Cross. But now, like a phoenix rising from our underground bunker, its back! For those not in the know, Firecracker Chinese restaurant and takeaway in Windmill Row was closed during Covid, opened briefly, and then closed for over three years owing to a pesky flooding issue. We can  officially report that the Runoff loves the new Firecracker. This time around the menu is shorter and cheaper and all main dishes come complete with rice or noodles. Just what one needs for a neighbourhood restaurant or a mid-week takeaway. 

Your scribe went to Firecracker with Bunty from HR.  As Bunty purports to be posh, he resisted sharing a starter. However, after being stabbed with a chopstick and a quick reminder as to who was paying, Bunty relented and we shared a prawn and chive dumpling. These were good quality with plenty of filling inside the glutinous dough and there was range of dipping sauces available. Bunty then went for a char sui roast pork and upgraded the steamed rice for chicken rice (but of course). This dish also came with some pak choi as standard. The pork was delicious and the chicken rice a revelation. Rebecca, our server, explained that this is rice cooked in chicken stock. 

Your scribe had a black bean sauce stir-fry with chicken served with steamed jasmine rice. The intense bean flavour set of the jasmine in the rice very well, with loads of juicy peppers and onions swimming in the mix. For those familiar, inside Firecracker it’s the same vibe as before. There are half a dozen or so tables with comfy seating and it is pleasantly, if a little brightly, lit for people of a certain age. Overall a comfortable place for a casual meal. There is a short wine list and prices are all in the £20-30 range.

We are glad to have Firecracker back and we think the simple and value-for-money menu will be a hit with former and new fans alike. Make sure you give heartly hello to manager/server Rebecca, who owns Firecracker with her family and who lives around the corner. 

Kennington Tandoori and Their Discount

For reasons relating purely to our highly scientific yet wholly subjective Top Ten Best Places to Eat in Greater Kennington (+ one Sunday Roast) countdown,  your scribe and Karen from Finance made an exploratory revisit to Kennington Cross institution Kennington Tandoori. And to cash in on their 40% discount, but more on that later.  

We love the dark woods, slinky banquettes and high staff to diner ratio at KT, which lives in stark contrast to the kitsch appeal of nearby Ghandis, with their wonderful melange of celebs from a bygone era (Richard! Judy!) in the window. We started with two onions bhajis, which got Karen so excited that she ate both of them. While chewing, she waxed philosophical that this is a dish that demands a balance of crispness and softness, should be made with gram (chickpea) flour, and the added kick of spice was welcome. Karen stayed vegetarian for the rest of her meal, choosing Amritsari chole (a chickpea curry) and a tarka dahl. These both come as side dish sizes but together made for an adequate main. The chole was a particular revelation, medium to hot spice level and a great winter warmer. Tarka dahl is a reliable favourite, mildly spiced. 

Your scribe had the king prawn bhuna, which were cooked Sylhet style with carmelised onions, tomato, chillis and aromatic kaffir limes leaves. All very well balanced with just the right chilli kick. Your scribe experiences an existential, first world crisis when eating prawns in an Indian place. Do you eat the shells or burn your fingers getting them off? From the specials menu, Karen added an Afghan naan: effectively a naan studded with poppy and sesame seeds and was fresh from the tandoor. Your scribe had white rice. 

Until 30 November you too can also live like your scribe and Karen by taking advantage of the KT 40% discount by adding ‘Year40’ to your online booking. While a 40% is nice, what ends up happening with Runoff staff is that we capitalise on said discount by just ordering more items, which rather diminishes said discount. Please don’t turn into us because if you do, you’ll end up in a very dark place. 

Elephant Park Market

Over the years we’ve seen Oval Farmers Market become smaller and less relevant, which is an inevitable symptom in the evolution of our cherished patch. Well, maybe not so inevitable given that a lot things there are overpriced. So we welcome the new outdoor market that’s popped up in Elephant Park. Elephant Park Market is in the new park located just south of Elephant Road, the home of some amazing South American joints and sometimes home to gentlemen who enjoy an outdoor beverage.

Elephant Park Market is a new neighbourhood market for street food and drink, artisanal food and designer-makers, bringing together and supporting independent, local, ethical and sustainable food producers and crafts traders (yes, we’ve cut and pasted from the press release). On our visit we saw traders selling cards, pastas, biltong, honey, juices, coffee, beauty products and, umm, pencils. We have a particular weakness for those soaps with things stuck in them which look strangely edible, and they’re on offer as well. 

The Market at Elephant Park runs every weekend, Saturday and Sunday from 12 to 5, and features over 20 independent traders. But keep going as there is plenty of room for growth and it appears to be getting larger. 

Mimi’s, now Nosh at Marcellos

Nosh is one of those wonderfully overstuffed deli/sandwich joints that you really only get in London and New York, with every corner rammed with delicious looking oils, pastas, wines, and cheeses. Located at the top of Brixton Road, Nosh used to be Mimi’s Deli, best remembered  for the giant murals depicting women eating pasta and balancing boiling cups of espresso on their heads. After a brief period of renewal it has now been reimagined as Nosh at Marcello’s. Fear not, dear reader, as Marcello is Mimi’s brother and he has the same enthusiastic fervour for his products as did his sister.

As an Italian deli Nosh sells the usual items of antipasti, meats, cheeses, pastas, wines and coffee. However, Bettina from IT and your scribe came for the sandwiches. It was Bettina’s wish to consume her sandwich at work, but as we’re already struggling to get dust, crumbs and wine stains out of our keyboards she settled for the small yet delightful seating area at the back of Nosh. She had the Italian sausage with roasted peppers, Napoletana sauce and mozzarella. She commented on the generous amount of filling saying it had the flavour profile of a sausage ragu in panini form. It was rich, filling and had a lovely sundried tomato tone to it. 

Your scribe had a tuna melt in panini form which was so well dressed with parmigiana that we thought it had been dropped by accident. It was lightly grilled and served with a salad with balsamic glaze and Italian tomatoes. A lighter but no less filling feed than Bettina’s. At around £8 to £10 we thought it was good value considering that we live/work in central London and it’s independently owned. The café is adorned with some pleasing objet d’arts and is a prime spot for just a coffee or a tempting cannoli that you can inhale with one hand whilst gliding through Kennington Park. 

Nosh also has a tempting array of dried pastas and sauces, oils, breads and panettone that would work well as Christmas gifts. They would also act as suitable pressies for Runoff staff. Just DM us. 

The Tommyfield £20 Roast Deal. But Will It Make the Top Ten?

In anticipation of our upcoming highly-scientific-yet-wholly-subjective Top 10 Best Places to Eat (+ one Sunday Roast) countdown in early 2025, we recently paid a visit to Kennington Cross stalwart The Tommyfield to inspect their Sunday Roast. The Tommyfield has had a few ups and downs with its kitchen over the years but here at Runoff Towers we think it’s on an up right now. Our last few weekday evening visits have seen us enjoy consistently good quality of output from the kitchen, whether it is the top notch pies or reliable burgers and fish & chips or some of the more adventurous offerings. 

As getting Phil from Accounts to go to a pub in the daytime is about as easy as getting a cat to drink milk, he joined us for our roast experience. Phil had the pork belly and it was generous and nicely roasted, the carrots and parsnips were a concentration of roasted perfection, cabbage still had some bite (good) and the roast potatoes were crispy and neat. The gravy was of a high standard and served in a little jug which we had to remind Phil was not, in fact, a shot glass.  It was thick and poured over the whole plate.  

Your scribe had the chicken roast which was a huge slab of meat with a skin that was satisfyingly cooked almost to crackling stage. It was also served with carrots cooked just to the point of being sweet, roast potatoes, and cabbage. It was dutifully served with bread sauce and gravy. Note that the chicken roast doesn’t come with a Yorkshire pudding but can be ordered at an extra cost *wags finger and points at Tommyfield*, and this was our only gripe as everyone on planet earth loves a Yorkie. 

We don’t see a Yorkie. Can you see a Yorkie?

The Sunday roasts also come in a beef and lentil format and are priced at £19. However, we took advantage of their special offer and for £20 had a roast and dessert. We had very fresh banoffee pies which we managed to convince ourselves was the healthy option as it had a banana stuck into it. The  Tommyfield Roasts are delicious, but is it enough to dethrone 24 The Oval from its longstanding perch as best Roast in the area? All will be revealed in February. 

The Tommyfield is also home to Always Be Comedy; a stonking comedy night that now runs most nights of the week. Over the years we’ve seen (oops better pick up that names we’re about to drop) Harry Hill, Romesh Ranganthan, Sara Pascoe and Joe Lycett, to name a few. And laughing with the people onstage is only half the fun, as all the punters resemble a giant casting call for the ‘Apprentice’. 

Kachori, Betty & Joan

Karchori 

It is now established dogma that a place is in trouble when they start to have bingo nights. And they’re in even more trouble if anything they do involves a drag queen. So when our friends over at Kachori, the newish Indian in Elephant Park that we checked out last year, announced they will be having a drag bingo night, we knew that something very dire was happening and here’s how you can help. 

Drag bingo is hosted by Party with Ginger and for £45 a head you have a two course, drag inspired meal (???!!) with free flowing prosecco. On top of a £10 admission this comes up to £110 a couple. Now we would never tell you how to spend your dosh, but for that kind of money we reckon you could get Ginger herself over to your gaff to rustle up a few curries while shouting out numbers. However,  this for a good cause so please support them if you can by popping in for a poppadum or a drink. Drag Bingo at Karchori is on 30 October and tickets can be grabbed on their website. 

Another reason we can’t allow Kachori to fall by the wayside is that its perhaps the only restaurant in London where you can eat the table wear. We kid you not. 

BETTY AND JOAN

Staying in Elephant Park and remaining on drag, a new bar and comedy club is opening and we couldn’t be more excited. The bar is listed as being gay, with cabaret and drag, but if that’s not your handbag the comedy appears to be more mixed. They’re having an opening party on 11 December and if you want to join the waiting list then enter your details over on their website. They fling open their majestic doors later this year, so stick that in the little sparkly diary we’ve been telling you to buy for ages. 

Chocolate Dino Company

Chocolate Dino Company is an independent bakery/sandwich joint/cocktail bar (whew) in Kennington Road. Owned by two local guys who live behind the place, we last visited Dino for a sweet treat during their embryonic opening days. Now that they’re established we’re revisiting for their savoury options….and of course to enjoy another giant cookie.

When entering their very stylish premises, what you initially encounter are voluminous offerings of croissants with various fillings, brownies, muffins, cookies, and things made to look vaguely healthy by the inclusion of a piece of fruit. But we were here for savoury fare, and Karen from Finance chose the bacon and egg bagel with cheese, which she excitedly chose to have toasted. It was presented with two omelette style eggs and the bacon was proper and crispy. The sauce was in a Dino manner properly inventive and involved sweet onion jam and Sriracha mayonnaise. 

Your scribe enjoyed a pastrami bagel with caramelised onion, pickles, and a mustard/mayo sauce. It was generously stuffed and kept us going through the endless stream of faxes received later in the day. These particular bagels might not be available when you visit, but they will doubtless have other offerings and the boys can talk you through the options. And as we have the discipline  of an unneutered cat, we of course had a white chocolate cookie with an strange looking yet delicious smear. Heated to perfection. 

Dino is an independent bakery/restaurant/bar and they’re throwing everything they can to exist in a very crowded and increasingly uncompetitive market. Their price point for baked goods (£5 for an eat in cookie) puts them very much at the ‘gourmet’ end of the market, but you can easily pop over for a coffee or something at the lower end of their price spectrum. And in a way a trip to Dino can be quite efficient, as where else can you knock out two sins by eating a cookie and drinking a glass of wine at the same time?

Chocolate Dino Company is open Thursday to Sunday. Check out their socials for the precise timings. 

Getting Fishy at the Prince of Wales

One of the joys of going to the Prince of Wales in Cleaver Square is that it gives one the otherworldly feeling of being transported to a rural pub in the Cotswolds. A place populated by people wearing cords in the summer and saying things like ‘well, daddy’s having a bugger of a time housing that second pony’. But when a meal deal is in the offing we don’t mind sticking out a bit   

We came to the PoW to enjoy their Fishy Friday meal deal, which entitles diners to two fish and chips for £20, and this great value was definitely the default option for most of the diners we saw. You might think this keen pricing would mean some skimping on portion size but this was not the case. Our fish was beautifully fresh, large and in a crisp batter that had been made in house, and possibly so was the tartare sauce it came with. The chips were serviceable, of the “chunky McCain’s” variety. We do wish more places would offer homemade chips, but understand they are a hassle. Finally there were some minted mushy peas thrown in the mix. 

When our surreal evening with Tarquin and his floppy haired pals drew to a close we departed, only to encounter outside the pub a group of men MORRIS DANCING! And they were throwing serviettes in the air. In KENNINGTON! This was quiet enough surreal country fun for one evening so we gave them a wide berth but the evidence is below. And you don’t get that at All Bar One. 

Metropolis London

If you dare venture into other neighbourhoods, you might have detected that big venues full of small eateries are now well established. An example is Market Place in Vauxhall which we reviewed in 2022. With  Railtrack’s mission of gentrifying the gays out of the Vauxhall arches now nearing it’s completion, we felt compelled to visit enormous Metropolis London in Albert Embankment.  While Metropolis itself is far from independent it’s food stalls definitely are, and here is what we found.

We took new intern and overall zippy gal Beth for a working lunch. As Beth is on a health kick, she headed over to the Curry Club  and chose the dahl with spinach and paratha. At £6.99 this has to be one of the bargains of the Metropolis food options (which aren’t exactly cheap). As you can see, it was a small but adequate serving of a luscious dahl with good spice and coconut coming through and it is served with two whole parathas, providing plenty of that flaky, stretchy Indian flatbread to soak everything up. She pronounced it to be very good indeed and a terrific lunch option.

Your scribe headed for the curiously named Uzbeki place ‘Shpaz’, which Beth observed is the sound that a tiny dog makes when it pops out of a posh lady’s handbag and sneezes. For £10 we had the Lag Nam chicken noodles. Served in a rich broth, this healthy option featured hand pulled noodles, carrots, celery, peppers and what tasted like barberries and dried coriander. Very light and satisfying.   Other cuisines at Metropolis include Italian, Thai, burgers, pizza, Japanese and Greek. And of course poke bowls, as it is now illegal to have a food village without one. 

Metropolis occupies two huge arches and there are plenty of tables both outside and in. Outside features a cute coffee/pasty hut which also serves pints. The second arch is dominated by a massive bar and a stage to appeal to an evening crowd. While it is very sad that thanks to Railtrack independent LGBTQI+ assets such as Above the Stag theatre have gone to that giant curtain call in the sky, at least there are some independent shops of a fashion opening up in their place.