Always Be Comedy – Tommyfield

Did you know that we have a top flight comedy night  right here in Greater Kennington? It’s called Always be Comedy, and is a favourite here at Runoff Towers after a stressful day of faxing and stapling . It takes place upstairs at the Tommyfield pub and is MC’ed by the effervescent James Gill. In addition to the comedy, James lays on fun games such as ‘who has the posher name’ (no mean feat with that lot)

On previous outings we’ve seen the likes of Mo Gilligan, Harry Hill, Joe Lycett, Katherine Ryan, Russell Howard, Romesh Ranganathan, Josh Widdecombe (whoops – better pick up those names we just dropped!), all for  £12. And some before they became famous.  The only trick is you need to be quick off the mark, and also some are billed as ‘secret’ so it is probably a good idea to be on their mailing list. And if you’ve never heard of the comedian, you might discover somebody new and only exerted a walk over and stumble back from Kennington Cross in the process. 

The crowd at ABC makes you feel a bit like you’ve stumbled across an audition for the next season of ‘The Apprentice’, but if you can move beyond that (and the pricey pints) then it’s a fun night. If you plan to make a night of it, for food we would give the Tommyfield a miss and suggest the excellent Korean/Japanese joint ‘Kuma’ a few doors down. ABC also do a night in Wandsworth, but that isn’t Greater Kennington so who cares.

There are people with actual full heads of hair at these shows

The Murger Han Experience

We experienced a small gust of thrill when we saw the sign for new Chinese in Elephant called ‘Murger Han’. As it rhymes with ‘Burger Van’, we envisioned delicacies such hamburger egg rolls. As it turns out, it’s billed as ‘London’s first authentic Xi’ian restaurant ‘, which provided us with another gust, as two of us at KR towers have actually been to Xi’an on the very street where this food is made. The food is a wonderful departure from the Cantonese gloop that we’ve been spoon fed for decades, and comes from an area of China where wheat replaces rice and the food becomes infused with spices such as cumin.

Murger Han promotes itself as Chinese street food, and  murgers themselves are meat filled sandwiches. They looked hearty, but the thing to order here is the speciality of the house, and that is biang biang noodles. These noodles get their name from being stretched and slapped into long slinky bands until they’re thin and chewy. Your scribe  had the noodle with shredded beef and black fungus, with the compulsory Chinese black vinegar sauce and added garlic oil.

Alice from Finance had her noodles with spicy pork, tomato, egg and vegetables (the variations being endless). She reported the dish as having ‘quite big flavours and spicy but not overwhelmingly – really rich and flavourful, served in a beautiful big bowl’. The noodles have a long and almost intestinal look to them but don’t let that put you off as they result in a joyous slurp. The mains are between £12-£14 which without booze (rare for us) is pretty reasonable. They also serve noodle and dumpling based soups. 

We visited Murger Han on a rainy Saturday, which proved almost fatal as the floor is totally marble and patrons were sliding all over the place. The marble extends up the wall, giving the place the appearance of a 90’s strip club, softened somewhat by the presence of cute emoji throw cushions, which we found curiously appealing.  But if the atmosphere doesn’t arouse you’ll find the food absurdly satisfying, and is a great, slurpy and slippy way to spend an afternoon or an evening. 

The Resurrection of Amici

If you’re a frequent Runoff Reader (and if not you’re really missing out) you’ll be aware that we review places anonymously in order to avoid preferential treatment and to remain unbiased. So we have to put our cards on the table as we kind of know the proprietors of ‘Amici’ in Kennington Cross  so the information is not technically a review but just details.  

After mostly being closed for the past 2 ½ years, Amici is back in soft launch phase. They’re goal is to merge the classics from their (RIP) Persian restaurant Doost with the Mediterranean offerings of Amici. For a split second we had a nightmare vision of pomegranate pizza, but owner Houman explained that it’s just the greatest hits of each place, and as the kitchens get fitted it’s primarily Persian, which suited us just fine. 

Phil from IT had one of the specials, a meatball dish from the northern, Caspian region of Iran. It was markedly tart with a pomegranate and herb-based sauce, so a bit different from what we think of as “standard” Persian. It was served with fluffy basmati rice. Your scribe had a long grain rice dish with fresh prawns and calamari. And of course, served with loads of dill. It was light and had a slightly nutty tone to it. 

Our party of five weren’t planning to get starters, but co owner Sethi was able to tell us not only from where each dish originated and how it’s made, but even offered insight as how her family members have been making them for years. So we caved in and had a kind of Persian bruschetta topped with aubergine, and a spinach frittata. As this is just info we’re imparting, you’ll need to decide for yourselves if this is for you.  

Sethi also explained that they plan to re open the deli which briefly held sway at the front of the shop, and have themed nights such as Persian dancing and speakers. That sounds great, but Houman if you are reading this (and if not you’re really missing out) please do not again fill your restaurant with used books, clothes, tinned food and jewellery for sale. You might think it looked like a canny business move, but to the rest of us it just resembled aunt Mable’s loft after she’d kicked the bucket.   

Market Place Vauxhall

We bear a degree of pragmatic skepticism when it comes to the independent credentials of these food halls which have been popping up recently such as Mercato Metropolitano in Elephant. However, we love the small traders which use them to establish and build their little foodie businesses, which is why we just inspected the spanking new Market Place in Vauxhall. 

Over the years many things both enriching and a bit disturbing have sprung out of the railway arches in Vauxhall, and luckily Market Place next to the station falls into the former category. The collection of stalls includes Thai, Mexican, Mumbai street food, pizza, pasta, Sri Lankan, Argentinean, and Turkish. There are also a few exports from Borough Market including ‘Bread Ahead’ and Caribbean joint ‘Rudi’s’, and we can definitely recommend their chicken wrap. As there is also a bar and is open until 10:00, Market Place can be useful for those ‘I don’t wanna cook and want a drink’ nights. So, most nights for us in the office. 

Marching merrily on to the food, your scribe headed to MoMo Thai and had the Pad Kra Pao stir fry. A Thai staple, it was packed with chicken mince and holy basil with a slightly spicy jasmine rice and topped with a fried egg. Karen from Finance took the low carb route and headed via the Argentinean Grill for her steak salad. It came with a surprisingly large amount of steak which was slightly cut and pink. A bit chewy but pleasant. A proper amount of salad came with it as well as a generous lash of chimichurri sauce. 

We here at the Runoff are hoping that the folks over at Market Place aren’t charging extortionate rents to these small traders as it will only hobble their chances of growth. When we’ve interviewed some of these folks they’ve expressed gratitude at the platform and exposure it has given them, and long shall it continue. And it also exposes us all to cultures and cuisines that we might otherwise not encounter in our fair manor. Bon appétit! 

Casa Madeira

If you’ve ever strolled through Vauxhall you’ve certainly walked past Casa Madeira multiple times. Madeira is the restaurant in a quartet of Portuguese establishments in Albert Embankment and is flanked by a cafe, supermarket  and further down by a further bar/café called ‘Pico’. Outside you can usually find clusters of folk drinking Sagres under umbrellas and chatting in Portuguese, which makes you feel as if you’ve just stumbled across a delightful bar in Lisbon as opposed to a railway arch in Vauxhall next to a petrol station. 

We chose to sit outside on what was a balmy, lovely evening and without a reservation, which was fine. The space was large and well set up, with some high octane background muzak and screens and plants which provided helpful sensory deprivation from the road and aforementioned petrol station. The service staff were friendly, efficient and drilled to near perfection about the food on offer — with our waiter’s specific knowledge of the fish market in Funchal leaving just this side of aroused. We therefore started our journey with deep fried whitebait which were nicely plump, breaded, and plentiful. Served with lemon and tartare sauce, their little silvery tails popping out to remind us of the goodness inside. 

Portuguese mains are more or less variations on a theme, and this is the case at Madeira. We saw whizzing across the pavement chorizo, lamb cutlets, and chicken escalopes. However, we came here for the fish and seafood and to satisfy you, dear reader, we splashed out on the fish grill for two. This huge dish consisted of two chargrilled pieces of seabass, blackened salmon, black scabbard fish, and this was topped by two enormous butterflied king prawns and a scattering of calamari rings. All soaking in olive oil with sides of carrot, beans and new potato. Delicious and grilled by a person who knew what they were doing. This was perfectly matched with a Portuguese white (wines start at £26)

Prices at Madeira are reasonable, and at times remarkable, based on what they are serving and given the joint’s proximity to the West End.  We paid £41 for the seafood but you can blow the bank on turbot for two (£75) or just pop in for a pint and pastal de nada (£1.50). We recommend the fish and seafood and also the meats on offer. Pizza and burgers also make an appearance for some surreal reason but if the spirit takes you there then go for it. And if you’re wondering just what the hell scabbard fish is, lets just say that it resembles one of those deep sea creatures that washes up on beaches every few years that people assumed was extinct.   

Lightnin’ Hot Things @ Orbit

We recently paid a visit to Greater Kennington’s (Walworth) own local brewery ‘Orbit’ on a hot sunny day to inspect their Sunday roast offerings. The roast and indeed all the food on offer at Orbit are provided by the chefs of ‘Lightnin Hot Things’ (below) who run a very experimental kitchen in one corner of the brewery. It’s actually quite remarkable that they produce such a range of food in such a proscribed space.  We sampled some of their other offerings a few months ago and you can read about them and the beers here

There were four of us on our visit but it was almost three, as Doug from IT was pretty sure the guy in the middle of this photo was the same person who mugged him in Soho in 2018. When we convinced him that this was pretty unlikely we had enough people to enjoy a variety of the roasts on offer.  Our booked table was initially outside, but when we pointed out that we’d rather not end our meal resembling their acclaimed pickled beetroot, the chipper barman moved us indoors and with its makeshift plywood seating created a distinct elbows on tables experience. 

Doug opted for the lamb shoulder which was generous, soft, flavourful and dolloped with mint sauce. All roasts come with an enormous Yorkshire pudding, and owing to its juicy and crispy quality it hadn’t been anywhere near Aunt Bessie. Other sides were great too – its always good to see Savoy cabbage, tasty roast carrots too and caramelised onions on a plate. And the confit garlic was a nice surprise touch. 

Your scribe indulged in the herb fed chicken topped with two chunks of chicken crackling. The chicken was moist and bountiful- just about cooked perfectly.  From the gravy I received a distinct hit of rosemary and garlic,  and  given its meaty and flavourful nature obviously owed none of its heritage to Bisto and a kettle. The sides were the same as Doug’s with the addition of what seemed like a very nutty butter puree. Another of our party had the rump of beef roast, which had obviously been slow cooked and melted in the mouth. Overall these were well worth the £18.50 price. 

If you don’t fancy the Sunday roasts, the Lightnin’ Hot Things boys offer up some pretty avant garde fair during the week such as octopus salad and curried coconut. We’ve commented on the beers in previous posts, but as its summer the current favourite at the moment is, hang on……tzatziki flavoured beer. We tried some and it had zesty, cucumber notes and it rather reminded us of cider. With this observation the chipper barman became slightly less chipper, saying ‘no, this is not cider’. 

Rarebit

We recently attended the soft launch (incognito, of course) of new Elephant establishment ‘Rarebit’. Rarebit is located at the end of foodie avenue Sayer Street in the mind bending ‘Millennials only’ playground that is Elephant Park. While Rarebit is primarily a restaurant, it has joined the current wave of joints also selling upmarket food items and wine. The wine you can purchase and drink at your table for a corkage fee of £15(!). Beers and cocktails are also available, and we started with a cooling Negroni. 

As this was opening night, what was on offer was a half price taster of what they plan to serve going forward, plus a few freebies.  We were served by a precise and professionally drilled service staff who knew quite a bit about what they were serving, especially considering it was their first day. Also on deck was a much more proprietorial looking gentlemen who offered helpful suggestions. The broccoli with harissa yoghurt was the most delicious dish and the best value. It came nicely cooked and great savoury creamy slickness, and a medium sized portion was £3.25. Next best was the sausage roll, a freebie sampler with great pastry and a flavourful herbed sausage. Deep fried rarebit balls were naughty but nice, also freebies. Scallops with pea purée and black pudding were good but we’d have felt let down paying full price (£13?) for two small scallops that you can inhale in two minutes. For drinks we chose a wine suggested to us and it was moderately good value. 

Rarebit is an independent restaurant which prides itself on working with fine British producers and the menu features breed meats (whatever that is) and also plenty of veggie options. They are also available for a coffee, pastry or a quick drink. And apparently soon a Sunday brunch. A fun evening and an affordable one too if you can catch them during their soft launch. 

Pros – Chripy serving staff and doors sweeping out onto Elephant and Castle 

Cons – Chripy serving staff and doors sweeping out onto Elephant and Castle 

The Ten Best Restaurants in Greater Kennington #4

(+ One Sunday Roast)

THE CORIANDER

Greater Kenningtontonians are almost as opinionated about their curry as their Sunday roast, but we find that the best hands down to be The Coriander in Vauxhall. We are aware that such a bold assertion is controversial and might make you want to hurl tarka dahl our way but since you don’t actually know who we are that’s not gonna happen.

Coriander specialises in North Indian, Bengali and Nepalese cuisine. The garlic naan is just right – not too thick and herbs going through it. For side dishes, the  baingon motor (aubergine) is  a standout treat, and their other starters cover all the bases of North Indian food. For the mains, our favourites are the chicken tikka naga (above) with hints of cloves, cumin and loads of heat.  All the good curry house standards are also in evidence, and we particularly like the handi laze, which is spicy chicken with chillies and fragrant cardamon, given some zing with added lemon. And as with most Indians, there are a range of veg options. There are also a huge range of rice options, and we prefer the good old fashioned pilau.

Honourable mention in for Indian food goes to proper old school curry joint Gandhis in Kennington Cross which just missed our list. As you can see by celebrity strewn pictures in the window, if it’s good enough for Richard and Judy, Neil and Christine Hamilton, and some lady who’s a dead ringer for Hyacinth Bucket then it has to be good enough for us mere mortals and deserves second Indian place.

The Best Sunday Roast in Greater Kennington

24 THE OVAL

We would like to take a pause from the nail biting and profoundly moving Top 10 list to announce that the best Sunday Roast in Greater Kennington can be found at the very cheffy ’24 The Oval’. The runner up is new kid on the Vauxhall block ‘Jolly Gardeners’ which almost knocked off ’24’ for reasons petulantly outlined at the end of this post. 

What immediately strikes you about 24 is that it is truly a temple to good food and quality ingredients. The wait staff know about the food they’re serving, and the open kitchen is a symbol of their honest approach to food. During lockdown, 24 transformed itself into a farm shop with a sideline in craft bottled beers. We were very pleased to see that this little tradition continues selling everything from Cava to carrots. 

As an ‘amuse-bouche’ each table of two is served with four miniature Yorkies served with a delicious gravy probably made with beef drippings (vegan options abound, however). My dining partner and Sunday Roast connoisseur had the pork belly which was generous and nicely soft and sticky in all the right places. Your scribe had the lamb and the shoulder was served shredded, with the leg served in pink and fatty strips.  As it is one of their specialities, the Yorkshire puddings were large and just the right side of crispy. Both roasts were served with more hearty gravy served from a saucepan.  Also evidenced was pea puree with a pleasing consistency not unlike that of baby food. 

What strikes you about 24 is that they have none of that ‘small sharing plates’ BS.  The real star of the show here is the very well cooked veg. In addition to those served with the roast, you are presented with so many additional veg items that they almost fall off the table. This included cauliflower cheese and roast potatoes which were perfectly crispy but with a soft centre. The carrots possessed an intense roasted flavour and savoy cabbage also popped in for a visit. An unexpected mystery guest for us were Jerusalem artichokes. The mains run between £19 and £23 which ain’t cheap, but we feel is worth it. 

24, if you are a KR reader (and if not you’re really missing out) we need to talk about something. You stand guilty of committing a crime pervasive in London restaurants at the moment. Namely, selling hugely overpriced wine. Your cheapest bottle is a not very cheap £29, which was almost 300% above the retail price. We are letting you off the hook as times have been tough but we’re watching you *wags finger*! Otherwise you make a mighty fine roast and you know it. 

The Ten Best Restaurants in Greater Kennington #5

(+ One Sunday Roast)

Kuma

We are back in Kennington Cross and this time at quirky haunt Kuma which makes its third appearance on the list. We were there last night as we are slightly obsessed with the place to ensure standards haven’t slipped. As we know some of you prefer takeaways to physical dining, the review below was made during the last lockdown. However, if you go in the flesh you will be treated to a background of K-pop music and extremely friendly staff. And Kuma, please never do away with your water served in Korean athletic sports bottles.

It’s Saturday night and time for a takeaway! Astute readers will be cognizant of our love of the Korean/Japanese joint ‘Kuma’ in Kennington Cross. We recently had a takeaway from there and, while not achieving the olfactory heights of being in the restaurant, is definitely worth a Saturday nosh. But Kuma, if you’re reading this we need to have a serious conversation about your excessive use of Styrofoam. Moving on..

Naughty styrofoam and delicious fried chicken


Your zealous scribe started with the painfully bang on trend Korean Fried Chicken. Kuma has three options; traditional, spicy, and we opted for the sticky soy garlic. The medium portion was huge and suitable for two. It had a great crispy crunch and slathered in a sticky soy garlic sauce. For the mains your scribe opted for the chicken bulgogi (say it like a pro…..Boo-GOH-gee) which were very thin strips of chicken grilled on a BBQ coated with a very good sauce called gochujang. Spring onion featured and it was consumed in lettuce wraps. It was billed as ‘hot’ and it certainly was, and so generous that your scribe couldn’t finish it.

My associate had the Kimchi Bokkumbap as a main, a Korean fried rice dish with the national ingredient kimchi (spiced fermented cabbage) topped with barbecued beef strips. A bit like Chinese stir fry rice with a heavy dose of red chilli sauce. It was topped with a fried egg and came with miso soup, and again was a very generous portion.