Metropolis London

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If you dare venture into other neighbourhoods, you might have detected that big venues full of small eateries are now well established. An example is Market Place in Vauxhall which we reviewed in 2022. With  Railtrack’s mission of gentrifying the gays out of the Vauxhall arches now nearing it’s completion, we felt compelled to visit enormous Metropolis London in Albert Embankment.  While Metropolis itself is far from independent it’s food stalls definitely are, and here is what we found.

We took new intern and overall zippy gal Beth for a working lunch. As Beth is on a health kick, she headed over to the Curry Club  and chose the dahl with spinach and paratha. At £6.99 this has to be one of the bargains of the Metropolis food options (which aren’t exactly cheap). As you can see, it was a small but adequate serving of a luscious dahl with good spice and coconut coming through and it is served with two whole parathas, providing plenty of that flaky, stretchy Indian flatbread to soak everything up. She pronounced it to be very good indeed and a terrific lunch option.

Your scribe headed for the curiously named Uzbeki place ‘Shpaz’, which Beth observed is the sound that a tiny dog makes when it pops out of a posh lady’s handbag and sneezes. For £10 we had the Lag Nam chicken noodles. Served in a rich broth, this healthy option featured hand pulled noodles, carrots, celery, peppers and what tasted like barberries and dried coriander. Very light and satisfying.   Other cuisines at Metropolis include Italian, Thai, burgers, pizza, Japanese and Greek. And of course poke bowls, as it is now illegal to have a food village without one. 

We are aware that these look like dishes that could be served in a prison canteen but….
photographing food is very difficult!

Metropolis occupies two huge arches and there are plenty of tables both outside and in. Outside features a cute coffee/pasty hut which also serves pints. The second arch is dominated by a massive bar and a stage to appeal to an evening crowd. While it is very sad that thanks to Railtrack independent LGBTQI+ assets such as Above the Stag theatre have gone to that giant curtain call in the sky, at least there are some independent shops of a fashion opening up in their place. 

Chocolate Dino Company

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We recently paid a visit to newish cookie/brownie/sandwich/coffee (whew) shop Chocolate Dino Company at the top of Kennington Road to inspect their fares. Dino’s Is owned by local boys Rafal and Marcin who joined the baking bandwagon, as so many Greater Kenningtonians did, during lockdown in 2020 (we interviewed some of them during the great flour/toilet roll crisis of 2020). What started as a mail order cookie business (and still is) evolved into the fellas beginning to sell their wares at pop up food markets and places such as Winter Wonderland and outlets such as KERB. This evolved into a Kickstarter campaign which resulted in the current business.  

In addition to cookies and brownies, the Dino boys also sell cupcakes, brownies, baked goods, sandwiches, coffee and, wait for it, beer and cocktails. At first we thought this a rather barmy concept, and then started thinking that this might rather be a stroke of genius. After all, what could be better than tying all your sins together by cramming a handful of cookies down your gob and then washing them down with a double G&T? 

We indulged in a classic chocolate chip cookie. It was big, dense, and we could smell the butter from the first bite. It had the right amount of sweetness and the chips oozed out onto Kennington Road. We also saw orange brownies, mango cookies, and such unorthodox ingredients as basil and pepper. We chatted to the boys in our notoriously anonymous fashion, and they explained that they’ve have travelled the world to gain inspiration and like to think of their offerings as a synthesis of what they’ve learned. 

Chocolate Dino Company is at 36 Kennington Road, only a few doors down from Gail’s Bakery. As if you needed another reason to not go to Gail’s, now you have one. They’re still in soft launch phase, so check their socials for opening hours (currently Friday to Sunday). And if you still choose Gail’s just remember….we’re watching. 

The Squeegies of Vauxhall

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Long before Vauxhall had a Starbucks and flats behind the bins at Fire nightclub that would set you back  £11,000,000, young people called ‘Squeegies’ popped up in Vauxhall Cross determined to make a bit of change by cleaning windscreens. The budding filmmaker Paul Bernays decided to make a documentry out of their lives, turning it into a film that was included in the long running BBC series ’40 Minutes’. You might remember an iconic episode in this series called ‘Angel’, about the tube station.  

Squeegies Follows the windscreen washing lives Del, Leah and Tony and a cast of others (including children) as they battle traffic in Vauxhall, relationships, alcohol and, in Leah’s case, pregnancy. Del is the sage of the group and actually has a family of his own and memories of almost being a popstar. There is something quietly life affirming about their quest for better things in a world stacked against them. 

Squeegies was shot in 1992,  So in the background can be seen the MI6 building nearing completion, Vauxhall cold store, and a roundabout without a giant bus shelter. 40 minutes and fascinating stuff. 

Bye Bye, M&S. Hello Walworth Road

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Tomorrow Greater Kennington’s only M&S Simply Food will be going to that big overpriced supermarket in the sky. Those of you reading this probably fall into four camps:

  1. Who cares?
  2. So sorry to see it go!
  3. I had not idea it was closing. Oh no! 
  4. WTAF, there was an M&S Simply Food in Greater Kennington?! 

Yes, technically it was in our borders, in Walworth Road. But there are plenty of wonderful, independent grocers/butchers/world food vendors still flourishing in Walworth Road. And if it wasn’t for Shwarma Hut at 292 we probably wouldn’t have survived lockdown. If you still need to mainline your M&S fix, we here at the Runoff have a totally unsubstantiated feeling that one will soon arrive in the new Elephant shopping centre. But we’re sticking with Walworth Road where you can find great Turkish, Caribbean, African, and other exotic fare. Oh, and there’s also a Morrisons for those not so creative types.

Free Weekend Fun in Vauxhall

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If you’re feeling vocal, the folks at Be In Vauxhall are once again hosting ‘Bearpit Karaoke’ this weekend. The press release describes it as ‘attracting huge crowds each month of both professional and non professional singers’. We walked by it last month and at first didn’t know if was Karaoke or some kind of weird spiritual revival. But it looked fun, and this year Mother Kelly’s and Bokit’la (Oval Market) French Caribbean will be on board with stalls amongst other great foodie offerings.

Bearpit Karaoke takes place this Saturday (8th) from 4 to 8 and then on every second Saturday of the month over the summer. Free tickets can be nabbed here. It’s located at that sketchy bit at the end of the Pleasure Gardens where you indeed might be accustomed to seeing people singing, but for once it won’t be men on their own bursting into song while gripping a bottle of ‘White Lightning’ or Swifties at the altar of the Black Dog.

We’ve been told that this is not, in fact, Catherine Tate

Also gracing Vauxhall Pleasure Gardens this summer is the Be In Vauxhall Summer Screen. If the weather obliges it’s a great way to spend a weeknight and enjoy knees up and singalong with your mates.  Our diverse office pool of subterranean misfits will be watching Barbie, but might opt for the marginally more butch Moulin Rouge. 

9 JUL AT 7PM – ENCANTO | BOOK YOUR SPACE

16 JUL AT 7PM – BARBIE | BOOK YOUR SPACE

23 JUL AT 7PM – MEN IN BLACK | BOOK YOUR SPACE

30 JUL AT 7PM – MOULIN ROUGE | BOOK YOUR SPACE

All of these nights look like great fun but please be aware that they don’t really kick off until about 8:30pm after the sun sets. Tickets are free and according to the website should be booked. Having said that, we’re not really sure why you need to book a place at either of these events as you can take part by sitting on a car bonnet or off a tree limb, so just turn up. It’s not like we expect Runoff readers to oblige by the rules. 

Panuozzo at Theos

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During a recent lunch break we paid a visit to Theos Pizzeria in Elephant. You may be aware that for two years we’ve crowned Theos as having the best pizza due to their creative toppings and sourdough base. However, with metabolisms not being what they used to be, for lunch we dropped the pizza and opted for their signature sandwich, the panuozzo. 

Described as a wood fired sandwich, Theos use the same delicious slow fermented pizza dough but reformat it into a sandwich-like form. Your scribe had the sausage and gorgonzola panuozzo, which was also rammed with creamy and salty gorgonzola, grilled mushrooms, mozzarella chunks, and rocket. On the side was a red chilli which packed a real punch, so it was used sparingly. 

Matilda from the digital subscriptions team sometimes gets overwhelmed with too many options, but with just four handy panuozzos to chose from she had the broccoli with anchovies, mozzarella and pangranatto. Pangranatto being a sort of crunchy garlicky breadcrumb, that might seem odd in a sandwich but was actually a nice crunch to complement the soft broccoli and mozzarella. There was a good but not overpowering flavour of anchovy to round things out and of course the bread itself was sublime.

The panuozzo is £6.50 which when you think about it, is about as much as a fancy sandwich at Pret nowadays. Matilda wanted a glass of wine but when we reminded her what happened the last time she had wine at lunch we had water and the bill was under £15. And with the mounds of cheese and filling kept us filled until dinner. As no one actually pays for this site, as we were leaving we asked Matilda exactly what she does at the office. She smiled and said coyly, ‘you know, I INVOICE’. OK. 

Barbarella and FlourishFest

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We have two very different events taking place in Greater Kennington this weekend which, to say the least, appeal to divergent crowds. This is fortunate as they’re happening at exactly the same time. 

This first is taking place at the glorious Cinema Museum, and is perhaps the most kitsch and camp film of all time; Barbarella. Jane Fonda plays Barbarella, who is sent from earth in the year 4000 to find scientist Durand Durand and crash lands on a distant planet only to be constrained by children with mechanical dolls. After escaping, Barbarella finds herself in Sogo where a new sin is created every hour. In Sogo she comes across a sex organ keyboard, a lesbian queen who can make her dreams come true, and a group of ladies who dispense the Essence of Man through a giant hookah pipe. Sounds like a normal day in the Runoff office. 

If you’re struggling to find Barbarella even remotely plausible, it will be introduced by means of a curated talk beforehand. The film also has a banging 60’s soundtrack. Barbarella is on Sunday, 19 May at 14:00 and tickets can be nabbed here. It will be shown on it’s original 1968 Technicolor print. We have no idea what this means but it must be important because its on their website. 

Roots and Shoots is a wonderful UNESCO award winning charity and vocational hub dedicated to educating disaffected young people aged 16 -25 in Lambeth and Southwark and preparing them for the world of work through one year internships in areas such as horticulture and retail. We wrote about them in 2019. It’s also a green space for urban biodiversity and is frequently visited by school groups eager to learn more about plants and gardening. 

This weekend is Roots and Shoots charity spring festival, FlourishFest, which sounds like great fun. There will be happenings for all ages such as beekeeper demonstrations, food stalls, printmaking and art workshops. We think most of our readers don’t have little kids (rather, we hope they don’t) so with these events we always road test them for adults. There are a number of activities just for us grownups such a talk on sustainable gardening, growing things in small spaces, and a guerrilla gardening and seed bomb making workshop (now that sounds fun), and a talk on peat free gardening. 


FlourishFest is on Sunday, 19 May from 11:00 to 14:00. Admission is just £3 for adults and £1 for kids. We’re unsure if a sex organ keyboard will make an appearance but as this is Greater Kennington anything could happen. 

Tim Hetherington at IWM

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Feeling cultured for the first time in 2024, we recently paid a visit to our very own world class museum-we-bet-you’ve-never-been-to, the Imperial War Museum. What drew our attention was an exhibit of the work of photographer Tim Hetherington, who was technically a war photographer but much more interested in the personalities and back stories of the people in front of him.

As an independent journalist, Hetherington joined rebel convoys in west Africa, bunked up with GI’s in Afghanistan in 2007, chronicled droughts and harvests, and captured the early days of the Arab spring in Libya (which cost him his life). And while he was at it, managed to win four World Press Photo Awards and nab an Oscar nomination. As you do… 

What this show is not about, consistent with the ethos of the War Museum itself, is a glorification of warfare. Hetherington’s concept was more sociological and, as the title indicates, about storytelling. In the videos that augment the exhibit, Hetherington and his colleagues discuss his photography and the unique way in which he obtained his images. Unlike other photographers, he never asked his subjects to pose in front of a silent lens, preferring instead to interact with the subject, even if they didn’t share a language.  

Especially if you are a militant pacifist, this kind of journalism is of crucial importance as it exposes the trials and injustices of society to a rich, safe first world who would rather just ignore them. But ignore this show at your peril, as it will keep you thinking. Storyteller: Photography by Tim Hetherington is on now until 29 September and, like all wonderful things in life, is totally free. 

Crossing the Thames (or not)

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For those of you who are in the enviable position of being free in the daytime, or are just unemployed, we’ve unearthed a fascinating sounding walk along the Lambeth side of the Thames called ‘Crossing the Thames’ (don’t worry there is no actual crossing to the scary north side). 

Our patch of north Lambeth was created by bridges and horse drawn ferries across the Thames. This nerdy yet captivating sounding walk tells the told and untold stories of crossings across the river and how they changed our community. Also included will be useless but very trivia such as why the bridges are painted in certain colours. 

If walking around pointing at bridges isn’t exactly your vibe, Lambeth Tour Guides also have a range of other fascinating sounding walks around our patch and further afield. Of particular note is ‘Unseen Vauxhall’ on 13 June which we might just attend. And no points for finding us as you don’t know what we look like. 

This walk was supposed to take place next week, but has been postponed until 7 June owing to rail action. Tickets can be scored for £12 here. Trust us, we tried to get you good people a discount using our line ‘but don’t you know -we’re INFLUENCERS’! However, this rarely works and is often met with outright derision.  

The Tommyfield

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As all of the Runoff staff love a bargain, we recently paid a visit to the Tommyfield pub in Kennington Cross to take advantage of their £45 for 2 steak and Malbec night, which is available on Wednesdays and Saturdays. We invited Karen from Finance to dine with us as we have a lot of time for her, and she needed a night out after some  damaging comments about her Excel skills.

We started with some sourdough and olives (not included) which were a perfect complement to what was upcoming. The steak options are rump and sirloin and your scribe chose the latter as it costs more and therefore created an increased thrill of saving money. The options for sauce are chimichurri, peppercorn or blue cheese, and the peppercorn was chosen for its sharp, gravy like tangyness. Both steaks were served rare and we were pleased with the result: It was a good quality steak, browned on the outside and just pink enough in the middle. And a big slab for what you’re paying. 

On sides front, your scribe had a creamy, buttery mash and Karen had the chunky chips, describing them as not too chunky, crisp yet fluffy, and the rocket salad was particularly well dressed . She chose the chimichurri sauce and was quite proud that the bit of Argentina on the plate matched nicely with the lovely and full bodied Argentinean Malbec (which is £28 itself) – Finca La Colonia. In fact, so enthusiastic was Karen that she proclaimed, while in the middle of chewing her rare stake, ‘this is so amazing that I’ve totally forgotten about those spreadsheet comments’. OK. 

The Tommyfield is run by independent south London based Three Cheers Pubs, who run eight other swishy yet beautiful pubs, mostly in Clapham/Balham. A few years ago we met the owners at a pub wine tasting that we snuck into attended and they love what they do. So next time you’re considering Kennington Cross pub options, give them a try as we love the little guy as opposed to a pub run by a mega chain (without saying names, it’s that one across street with outdoor seating). 

The Tommyfield also have a star studded and cracking comedy night that we frequent where we’ve seen the talents of Harry Hill (he was there only this week), Joe Lycett and Aisling Bea. And the punters look like they just stepped off the set of ‘The Apprentice’, which is half the whole event.

And if steak isn’t your thing, they have two other special nights as well…